I came across this really good article on feel good tips and i thought id share it with everyone. Im feeling prettyyyy down on this V-day so i figured anyone else thats also down in the dumps like i am would like to read these tips as well :P hehe


There are several sections on these tips.

LIFE
1- wake up and smell the roses. Having fresh flowers nearby is an instant mood booster, according to a study published in the web journal Evolutionary Psychology. Researchers found that giving women flowers made them smile straight away...And they were still feeling cheerful three days later!!

2- give yourself a pep talk. 'allow yourself credit for what you do well,' says Gladeana McMahon. 'Stop saying things like "anyone could have done it" when you've accomplished something. Congratulate yourself the way you would a friend.

3- Have fun with your girlfriends. Dust off your dancing shoes because researchers from Manchester Metropolitan University have discovered that taking part in activities like dancing, painting and playing music can help fight anxiety and depression, leaving you full of enthusiasm for life. Earlier studies have also found that people with full social lives tend to live longer. Make plans today!

4- Get creative. 'Start a journal and, at the end of each day, write down 3 things that you are please about and why,' says Gladeana. 'This can be made up of little things like "i was happy with the way i spoke to my kids today because i was firm, without losing it". Reading it will back will help increase your confidence.'

5- Have a 15 minute catnap. Researchers at the Sleep Research Centre at Loughborough University sing the praises of power napping - they've found that having a short sleep recharges the brain,without upsetting your body clock. So if you feel you're flagging, try bedding down when you get in from work.

6- Let go of negativity. 'Learn to let go when something goes wrong. Wishing things were different is a waste of emotional energy,' advises Gladeana. 'Going over the same situation in your head again and again means you are fighting the reality of what actually happened. And this type of circular thinking can prevent you from becoming more positive.'

WORK

7- Do 'off duty' dressing. 'Changing your clothes as soon as you arrive home from the office helps you out of "work mode", so that you can relax properly,' says stress management expert and medical columnist Dr Roger Henderson. Swap your suit for comfy joggers and feel the tension float away.

8- Gain some perspective. Imagine you have just 24 hours left to live. Would you spend it worrying about the little things, like the filing? Thought not. So what would you do?...This exercise teaches you to change your priorities in life,' states health and wellbeing expert Liz Tucker. 'You may feel stressed at work, but spending time with your family and friends is far more important.'

9- 'Cherry-pick' your worries. Are you working harder than usual but not getting anything done - and worrying like mad about it? 'Most of us worry about things that are never going to happen, but you're probably under a period of pressure that does have an end in sight,' says Dr Henderson. 'Try to gain some perspective, as learning not to "sweat the small stuff" means you've pretty much got life cracked.'

10- Just say 'no'. 'This is the most important tool in your fight against overload but many of us hate saying it, as we worry people think we're selfish,' explains Liz. 'Try the phrase "i know you're finding things hard, but i'm too stressed to help at the momeny".' When you find yourself less busy, you can make it up to them.

11- Release that angst. By learning to forgive your stress sources - your boss for giving you an extra project, your friends for complaining they never see you, your kids for always being untidy! 'Holding on to resentment clutters up your psyche and drags you down,' says Jane Alexander, author of the Overload Solution. 'Learn to forgive, and you will find life a lot easier.'

12- Drag out your problems.Use Liz's checklist to help you create your 'to do' list. She says 'D stands for do it - get the job done; R means review it - can it be done at a later date? A is for assign it - give it to someone else; G stands for get rid of it - do you really have to do it?'

RELATIONSHIPS

13 - 'For a healthy relationship. You need to dedicate at least two hours a week of quality time to your partner,' says couples' counsellor Val Sampson. 'Reconnect with them as an individual, not just as "dad" or "hubby",' she adds. 'Dont just talk about the kids- but about their interests instead,like you did at the beginning of the relationship.'

14- Learn to listen. 'Listening properly to your partner is not about waiting for your turn to speak,' advises Paula Hall, a sexual psychotherapist. 'You need to listen to them as intently as you would to someone giving you directions. Check back with them throughout the conversation to make sure you understand what they are telling you.'

15- Step forwards, not back. '5:1 is the perfect ratio for positive to negative steps in a relationship,' says Phillip Hodson, a fellow of the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy (BACP). 'When you upset your partner, you need to make 5 recovery steps, such as cooking a nice meal (step one!) to get back on par.'

16- Make a date (and stick to it). Even if you're super-busy, spending time with your loved ones should be a pleasure, not a chore. 'Writing a date down on the calendar allows you to make your brain take notice of the date, as it is important,' says Val. And if you've a hot date planned with your other half, Val suggests leaving a heart-shaped sticky note on the fridge as a cute reminder.

17- Get texting! 'Sending a text is a great way to catch up,' states Paula. 'Even if you don't have the time for a lengthy chat, you can still stay in touch.' But make sure you do arrange to see your mates face-to-face every now and again. 'There is a danger of relying on email or texts, which can become impersonal,' she warns.

18- Do a 'tax return' on your friendships. 'At the end of the year, assess your friendships as an imaginary joint back account,' Phillip advises. 'Is one friend constantly taking out more than you? Does she tend to talk about herself and let you down? If so, perhaps it's time to re-evaluate those "toxic" friends.'